In the midst of the growing, media-whipped hysteria over the swine flu, judging our president on 2 1/2 months of work and a skinny blonde beauty queen from Cali continuing to lecture us on how it’s okay to discriminate against the icky gays, I bring you news from my little Darvocet-added bubble of the world:

My cousin gave my gravely-ill uncle permission to die. On Facebook. On my page. Which whipped my youngest sister into a froth, causing her to leave me messages at work as to whether or not we should confer with our Dad on said events.

Like you do.

In other news, barely two weeks after being cold-cocked by someone I considered to be a dear friend and 15 years of friendship summarily flushed down the toilet, I receive a friend request on Facebook (notice an disturbing trend here?) from someone I lost seven years ago. Apparently, they had been thinking about me lately and wanted to renew ties.

I wonder what normal people are doing right now.

*bimbles off*

Carrie Fisher has a blog?!?!

Why didn’t someone fucking TELL ME???

*passes out with happiness*

P.S.: I’ve met her. Really and for true.

In the face of Rush Limbaugh, the Mormons, Levi whathisname, beauty queens, Perez Hilton and those hilarious teabaggers, it’s nice to see good news…. as in, the quiet, yet firm strides the Obama administration is taking to right the wrongs of the past eight years.

In particular, I’m glad to see our president has decided the government should get out of my uterus. Seriously. It’s not the town square or some religious facility. Everyone isn’t invited nor will there be refreshments. Get the fuck out.

So, today, the federal government said that the morning-after pill (Plan B) will be available, without prescription, to women 17 years of age and older. The decision came with the following explanation:

“The Food and Drug Administration took the action to comply with a judge’s ruling last month holding that the agency’s 2006 decision to limit availability of the controversial contraceptive to women 18 and older was invalid and politically motivated.”

Actually, you can strike the “politically” and insert “religiously” and then that statement is accurate. Because we know that allowing women the right to their own reproductive decisions is a big no-no in religious circles. I mean, what’s next… showing your ankles in public?

What makes my brain hurt the most isn’t that the fact that this article reminds me of just how bad things were under the previous administration. It’s this quote from a representative for “conservative” women:

“This decision is driven by politics, not what is good for patients or minors,” said Wendy Wright of Concerned Women for America. “Parents should be furious at the FDA’s complete disregard of parental rights and the safety of minors.”

*drums fingers on desk*

“Rights”?  What, exactly, are the parental rights being stripped away here? The right to force your daughter to carry a child she does not want, possibly cannot support and might not be emotionally ready to have?

“Safety of minors”?  Take a pill versus carrying a child to term and all the myriad of complications that can occur along the way? Gestational diabetes, developmental problems, pre-mature delivery and, goodness forbid, miscarriage… just to name a few.

Sometimes I forget that religion not only demands you turn over your faith, but your brains as well.

*bimbles off*

Some things you simply cannot take back,  no matter how dear you consider a relationship or person. I firmly believe this. When someone you consider a friend decides to sucker punch you so low… decides they are going to insult you beyond insulting… it’s just time to pack up your ball and go home.

When you bring a child into an argument, a child I have loved… helped fucking LIVE when he was a baby… when you use that child against me… that’s the end.

When you accuse someone of lowering themselves to be friends with you based on politics or religion or philosophy – a set of ideals you have tolerated in your mate, other friends and family – you’ve got issues I don’t even want to begin to understand.

When you throw more than 15 years of friendship out the window… when all those years mean nothing… then you are nothing to me.

When you are engaged in activities in your life that would, if made public, get you ex-communicated from your church, cause you to lose standing with your little circle of conservative “friends” and possibly be used against you by your ex in custody of a child… and, then you accuse me of hypocrisy in my thoughts for daring to speaking my mind… then, you are a hypocrite. Openly a hypocrite.

And, that’s the end.

*bimbles off*