With all due respect to Al Gore and global warming, Captain McDolphin driving his little hybrid car this morning and snarling up the fast lane traffic needs to either get a real goddamned engine or stop driving. In addition to his stellar driving skills, he was on his cell phone and had a piece of paper he was reading.

Yeah, serious bonus points if I had taken that guy’s back tire out with a gun.

*bimbles off*

When I’m stressed, I joke about chucking it all and moving to someplace isolated and remote, just so I can get away from everyone. Right now, I’m ready to go home and get my bags. I’ve reached my limits with people. Period. My greatest challenge at this point is to neither burst into tears or tell everyone I work with to go fuck themselves.

For all my cynical persona, I remain a pretty trusting person. I trust someone will be honest with me about themselves or do what they say they will or let me know if I’m fucking up. I trust people I’ve known for years to do a small thing like not deposit a check they said they would hold or simply contact me. All of these trusts and more have been broken within a week’s time, with the latest hitting this morning. Some can be fixed, some cannot. But, I really don’t even give a fuck at this point…. about any of it. I just want to go home, get under the covers and cry until I can’t anymore, then stay there for a month.

Army of Mom has asked me to guest blog for her while she and her family travel to Minnesota this week. And, while my blogging has taken a serious hit due to the new job, the thought of taking over a conservative, Catholic friend’s blog makes my pagan, liberal knees go weak.

We’re storming the bastille, kids. Be sure to pack a lunch.

*bimbles off*

I really believe this administration is taking its defense moves from the O.J. Simpson trial. When you are damned guilty and everyone knows it, throw blame and suspicion on everyone else, therefore muddying the waters enough to get away with murder.

GOP bill targets NY Times, June 28, 2006
House Republican leaders are expected to introduce a resolution today condemning The New York Times for publishing a story last week that exposed government monitoring of banking records.

The resolution is expected to condemn the leak and publication of classified documents, said one Republican aide with knowledge of the impending legislation.

The resolution comes as Republicans from the president on down condemn media organizations for reporting on the secret government program that tracked financial records overseas through the Society for Worldwide Interbank Financial Telecommunications (SWIFT), an international banking cooperative.

Rep. J.D. Hayworth (R-Ariz.), working independently from his leadership, began circulating a letter to House Speaker Dennis Hastert (R-Ill.) during a late series of votes yesterday asking his leaders to revoke the Times’s congressional press credentials.

The Standing Committee decides which organizations and reporters can be accredited, according to the rules of both the House and Senate press galleries. Members of that committee are elected by accredited members of those galleries.

So, revoke credentials for telling the truth? In this day and age, I’m stunned someone in the media had the balls to make the administration that mad. Truly. Of all the suck-up and willful swallowing of what Shrub and his lackeys vomit up on a daily basis, I’m glad to see there are some reporters who don’t believe our president is god and his friends are the disciplines.

President Bush criticized the reports during a press event Monday, calling the disclosure “disgraceful” and a “great harm” to national security. Vice President Dick Cheney, who voiced support for the program over the weekend, followed Bush’s criticism with harsh words of his own.

No, Mr. President, reporting the truth is not a “great harm” to our nation. What is harmful is an adminstration run amok, one that believes it is above the law, above criticism, above answering to the people of this nation. One that uses the fear of the great boogey man to subject little old women to anal probes at the airport, spy on our telephone calls and watch our bank accounts. One that wants to take control of a woman’s reproductive rights and tell us who we can marry and who we can fuck in the privacy of our homes. One that uses the judicial system to wrestle an election out of the hands of the voters and barge into the private decisions of person’s death. One that lies to go to war and then lies about the atrocities it commits during that war.

No, the disgrace here is not the reporting of the facts. It’s the facts themselves.

*bimbles off*

I know I’m waaaaay behind on this, but I’m doing my happy dance today that Kinky Friedman is officially on the November ballot.

AUSTIN, Texas — June 21, 2006 — Texas Secretary of State Roger Williams today informed independent candidate Kinky Friedman that his name will appear on the statewide general election ballot for governor this November.

The campaign delivered 170,258 signatures to the Secretary of State’s office on May 11. Of those, 137,154 signatures were considered valid, an 81 percent validity rate. (The state comptroller [Carole Keeton Strayhorn], who is also running as an independent, submitted 222,514 signatures of which 108,512 were valid, a 49 percent validity rate.) The signatures for Friedman’s campaign, which were collected during a 62-day period almost entirely by volunteers, represented voters in all 254 Texas counties.

I’m pleased we have two high-profile independents running in Texas, even though Carole Strayhorn is pretty much repug-light, lacking the money to beat the Rick Perry warchest head on. I think it just goes to show people are tired of the two party machine and want change. The repugs make the Nazis look leftist and the Democrats have their heads so far up their asses, they can see the light coming through their nose holes.

Someone was surprised the other day when I told them I had signed the petition for Kinky. “But,” they protested, “He’s not a politicial. He a musician, right?”

My reply – “Exactly.”

Go Kinky, kids. You’ll thank me for it later.

*bimbles off*

Note to self: The house garage door opener does not work on the parking garage scanner.

*bimbles off*

This sort of shit just makes my day.

WEST PALM BEACH, Florida (AP) — Rush Limbaugh was detained for about 3 1/2 hours at Palm Beach International Airport after authorities said they found a bottle of Viagra in his possession without a prescription.

Turns out Rush “Oxycontin” Limbaugh has a limp dick. *snort* Like we couldn’t have guessed that. Hope his prison mates are understanding about that little problem. Because all drug dealers and abusers should go to prison, right El Limpo?

*bimbles off*

It was a happy day indeed when Pixel discovered the magical warmth that is the top of a running clothes dryer.

For more cat bloggy goodness, visit the Friday Ark today and the Carnival of the Cats on Friday.

*bimbles off*

Kiss your favorite druid today.

*bimbles off*

My new job has brought on something unexpected – parking garage rage. And, I have a seriously bad case of it. First, please do NOT ride my bumper because I’m driving slow through a tight-packed, narrow parking garage. ‘Cause trust me, if someone backs out and hits me, you will hit me too. And, then, I’ll have to bury two bodies, not just one.

Second, have your fucking parking pass ready when you get to the reader. Is it too much to ask that you know where the pass is, oh, say, AHEAD OF FUCKING TIME! I don’t want to sit behind you at 5:30 p.m., waiting for you to finish your goddamned phone conversation and trying to find your pass in your purse or in all the shit you have heaped in your car.

*backs away and tries to take a deep breath*